How is it that white men systematically raped black women and faced no penalty but then lynched so many black boys and men under the accusation of raping white women? Why did I grow up not seeing any public displays of affection in my African household? Why was I acting fast and he just being a boy? Why was I told black people have rhythm and then chastised for dancing in a way that felt natural to my spirit? Why was I responsible for our chastity? Why was the horniness that came with my puberty not seen as lady like? Why is it that we're seen as hypersexual? That our men are reduced to a big penis, our women to big butts? Why do I feel shame when I orgasm? Are we being impacted from past trauma? How do we heal from this trauma? Do we love ourselves? Do we feel like there's something to love? Do we love one another? What is love?
These are some of the questions that have always weighed heavy on my heart but for so long I shied away from talking about sex. I felt like discussing sexuality was a luxury granted only to white and privileged people. Because when Blacks as a global community are struggling with hunger, financial stability, constant violence, just trying to survive; who has the time or energy to sit around and talk about sex? But then somewhere, rereading Audre Lorde, I'm sure, I began to see the connections between systematic change and individual liberation. How if this constructed White supremacist system was built and continues to operate on the denial of our humanity and exploitation of our Black bodies, then reclaiming our bodies is pivotal in the destruction of it all. How immersing our bodies in feelings of pleasure and love is an act of rebellion in a system that only wants us to internalize & externalize self-hate. How having healthy relationships to self & other Blacks is to resist the anti-Black messages we consume on a consistent basis. If I commit these statements into truth, then sexual liberation is a key component to Black liberation despite this idea not being discussed enough.
For me, Afrosexology is an outlet to search for those answers to my questions concerning Black sexuality. To continue the work of those before me who brought Black sexual politics to the forefront. To leap into my own journey of reclaiming my sexuality, body, and love in all its forms. And to learn and teach to and from others along the way with a deep desire for healing and liberation.
Other things about me: I’m a first-generation Liberian American, I think Spongebob is one of the funniest cartoons ever created, I have a Masters in Social Work, I almost only eat spicy foods, and I love a good trap beat.